At sixteen months old, my son is on the move and entirely interested in getting his body going. With the freedom of movement, it's becoming easier to see what he wants to do, what he wants to get into, and ultimately, what he wants to learn! If it's in plain sight, I'll know if he's interested. When I give him freedom to explore, I learn so much about his capabilities that I never realized and it reminds me of how fast children develop. Sometimes there are experiences and interactions that I must let him have and sometimes there are experiences I must support him through. Occasionally, there are things I need to prevent him from experiencing or keep out of his reach for safety's sake. It's can be difficult to maintain that delicate balance of allowing, supporting, and preventing experiences; difficult to remember how to orchestrate the environment safely without being controlling.
Sometimes we forget or fail to realize that a child may be interested and ready for something long before we decide they are ready to be introduced to it. We forget to give children opportunities and exposure to things that they might start to show interest in, or we become so worried about the messes and the clean up or safety that we avoid giving them those opportunities. Hey, parents are only human. The flaw can be that in our desire to keep our children "safe" or our environment "clean," we run the risk of our children missing opportunities to learn independence and skills. When those opportunities are given at the moment children show interest in them, magical things can happen. Children learn that we have faith in their abilities, that they can achieve things even when they are difficult, and that they can be confident in their choices. Sometimes the smallest things have the biggest ramifications.
So how do we know when they are ready? They show us; we just have to be prepared for the moment! In Montessori classrooms, we give children the opportunity to learn practical life (as we call it) skills by making sure there are activities they can show interest in. We teach children Care of the Environment and Care of Self by giving them the materials to participate in these kinds of activities. In my house, I have begun to set up baskets of these kinds of materials for my son. He has only occasionally shown interest in these things, but I know that by putting them out, the opportunity is there for his interest to be triggered!
First I put out a basket of things for him to care for himself. I included a small brush and comb, a tiny toothbrush that fits on his finger, and a wash cloth for wiping his face. These things are in a basket in front of a mirror so that he can look at himself as he cares for himself. Some families put these things on small tables and set up a sort-of vanity, but we don't have the space for that, so I set out a small carpet square he can sit on in front of the mirror.
Next I set out a small basket of cleaning things, so that he can mimic me in activities when he is interested. He has his own floor sweeper with dustpan, a Swiffer mop, an extra Swiffer sheet for dusting, and a towel for cleaning up things like spills.
I am beginning to build ways for my son to have more access to his eating and drinking supplies and choice over snacks. For now, I always make sure to give him a small cup with water and a utensil. Over time I would give him the exposure and see the reaction. At first I gave him a small cup and he'd stick his hands in it so I would take it away and try again later. One day, he started drinking from it. We have always given him utensils to "play" with, and then one day he began trying to eat with it and began requesting one if he didn't have one! In order to help him with the process I discovered the
Learn N' Turn which is making using a utensil much easier for him (it allows you to change the angle as the child's ability progresses):
Sometimes there's spilling; sometimes there's breaking. It happens. But every instance is a learning opportunity. The more we provide children with things to participate in the care of themselves and the home, the more connected they become to that process of care. And we have to remember to support and prepare for those opportunities, even if it does get a little messy :)
